It Is Barbaric And Must Be Stopped
Time magazine this week reported that 19 states still allow teachers to paddle students in schools. What is even more alarming is that adult acceptance of spanking, while lower than it was 50 years ago, was still approved of by 71% in 2004. The article made me realize that a blog post I wrote a couple of years ago is as relevant as ever. So I’m reprinting it this week with some editing to bring it up to date. If you didn’t read it, please read it now. If you did read it when it was originally published, please read [...]
Do you need positive self-esteem beliefs?
Many of you have contacted us after eliminating a negative belief using the Lefkoe Belief Process, asking how you can create a positive belief in its place. I explained why that isn’t necessary (or even possible) in a prior blog post: https://www.mortylefkoe.com/010510/# I’ve recently had some new insights about how to have a positive sense of yourself that expands on that earlier explanation. A positive sense of yourself can be experienced in two different ways: as the “creator” or the “creation.” A positive sense of yourself is both the natural experience of the “creator” and the result of specific beliefs [...]
Stop beating yourself up
There’s “good news” and “bad news” about the many personal growth improvement courses. The good news is that many of them actually provide information, which, if used, will improve your life. The bad news is that many of us have beliefs that prevent us from implementing the good advice. And there’s even worse news: Far too many people who find themselves unable to implement the advice in the course blame themselves. I’m weak. I can’t stick with anything. I’m not good enough. I’ll never amount to anything. There’s something wrong with me. Etc. If this sounds familiar, I’m talking to [...]
Why some get angry and others fear it.
The first time I really allowed myself to experience my anger I fainted. I was about 36 and had successfully suppressed my anger since childhood. And there I was in a group therapy session, hitting a mat with a stick with foam wrapped around it, screaming: “Mom, I’m really angry at you.” When I started the exercise I was only mouthing empty words, but then at some point the words became real and the anger surfaced. It terrified me so much that I literally passed out on the mat. I fainted the next couple of times I tried that [...]
Do your beliefs embarrass you?
“Everything I say to you is confidential, isn’t it?” This is one of the first questions our new clients usually ask us. The answer, of course, is yes. Nothing a client tells us is ever divulged to anyone. But I’ve found it interesting that so many people are concerned that others will find out about their beliefs. One obvious reason is that, for us, they aren’t beliefs; they are true statements about us. As a result, most of us are embarrassed about having such beliefs as I’m not good enough, I’m not important, and I’m powerless. And we don’t want [...]
Why do most of us act compulsively?
Why are so many of us “driven” compulsively to seek or do things that frequently aren’t in our own best self-interest? You probably aren’t surprised that my answer is: beliefs. But there is a specific type of belief that results in “driven” behavior. And it is formed in a very specific way. Let me explain. Imagine you are a young child who has created a host of negative beliefs about yourself or about life. (Very few of us escape childhood without forming a bunch of negative self-esteem beliefs. I’ve explained why in earlier blogs. https://www.mortylefkoe.com/031610/; https://www.mortylefkoe.com/wonderful-parents/#) At this point you [...]
How To Create A Better Relationship
Are you one of the millions of people who have been unable to find a loving, fulfilling, and exciting relationship? I am convinced that everyone can have the relationship of his dreams if he got rid of the beliefs that get in the way. I speak from experience because I had two marriages that failed because of my limiting self-esteem and relationship beliefs. After eliminating them I found and married Shelly, to whom I will be married 30 years in just a few months. People who know us are inspired by the incredible relationship we have. People can have several [...]
How to eliminate suffering and get enlightened
There are two fundamentally different ways in which we can experience ourselves. First, the way most of us usually experience ourselves: as a creation—a separate entity distinct from other entities, whose survival is always at stake. Some people call this the ego. Second, as the creator of that creation—as consciousness, as Self, as non-dual awareness, as that which has always existed and always will exist. The creation is experienced as an entity that is either “good enough” or “not good enough.” The creator, consciousness, Self is not experienced as someThing; rather it is a state of consciousness in which one [...]
I finally stopped bragging
It took me a long time to stop bragging. About 50 years in fact. As a child I always bragged about things that I thought would impress others. How good my grades were. Things I had done. Popular kids I hung out with. Having people think well of me was so important that I even lied just to impress others. When I was 17 I was living in Miami Beach in an apartment with my mom. From time to time I dated girls who visited Miami Beach on vacation. One time I remember driving past my aunt’s beautiful house and [...]
