“The Lefkoe Method is very effective at eliminating negative beliefs. But why don’t you replace them with positive beliefs?”
This is a very common question so I decided to devote this week’s post to answering it.
For many years we did attempt to “install” positive beliefs—the opposite of the “negative” belief that was eliminated—for example, I am good enough for I’m not good enough and relationships do work for relationships don’t work.
Although the new belief felt true at the moment for most clients, it usually didn’t feel true when we checked a week or two later. In other words, despite using several different methods to install the new beliefs, it usually didn’t work.
Is it Possible to Consciously Create New Beliefs?
Here’s why I think it is very difficult to have someone consciously create a new belief and then really believe it. A belief is the meaning we have given meaningless events in reality. When we do that it seems (for a visual person) that we can actually see that meaning in the world. It is the truth. You aren’t trying to convince yourself that the meaning is true; it is true for you. For a kinesthetic person, once you give a meaning to events, those events make you feel that meaning every time the events occur. Again, you aren’t trying to feel something; you can’t help but feel it.
This is the automatic process that occurs when you initially create a belief unconsciously. But it is very different when you consciously say the words: I am good enough or relationships do work—and hope that you will really believe the words you’ve uttered. You are saying it more like an affirmation, as something you want to be true, rather than as something you think you can see in the world (which would mean it must be true). Even looking at recent events that could validate the new belief wasn’t consistently effective.
We also tried having clients create the new positive belief after they had gotten into the “creator” space (after using the Who Am I Really? Process). I never kept records, but I’m not sure that this worked much better.
You Don’t Need “Positive” Beliefs
I never looked for additional techniques that might enable people to get the new beliefs to “stick” because I decided early on that it was more important for people to realize they were the creator of their lives, than they were a “healthier or better creation.”
Let me explain. I commonly use the words “negative” and “limiting” as descriptions of certain beliefs. In fact, however, beliefs aren’t negative or positive they are neutral. They result in certain feelings and behavior. If you like what they produce, you could say the beliefs are “positive,” but only because you arbitrarily like their manifestation.
Moreover, all beliefs are limiting by their very nature. You are what you believe you are (for you) and anything else is absolutely not true (not possible). Your beliefs about people and life also create boxes; what’s outside the boxes literally does not exist for you. (If you believe relationships always work or never work, you will interpret all relationships through that filter and no matter what you see couples do or don’t do, you will interpret it consistently with your belief. For you, relationships inconsistent with your beliefs cannot exist.)
Live As The Creator, Not a “Better” Creation
I concluded that it was more important to live as the creator of your life (as the sculptor) rather than as any specific creation (as a specific piece of sculpture). In the altered state of consciousness produced by the Who Am I Really? Process, you have no limitations and anything is possible.
So even if it were possible to install a new belief, I don’t think it would be particularly useful. If you have used the WAIR? Process (which is attached at the end of the free belief-elimination processes and is available in all of our belief-elimination programs), you know that it feels as if anything is possible and that you have no limitations. Next time you get in that space, ask yourself if the opposite of the beliefs you’ve eliminated feels true for you. In that space they will, whether you experience them as true in day-to-day life or not. In that altered state, you feel whole, complete, and okay just the way you are. You feel good enough, important, and loveable.
My advice to those of you who are interested in forming positive beliefs, use the WAIR? Process daily. Get into an altered state every day. And it won’t be long before it gets easy to have that experience of yourself even when you aren’t using the WAIR? Process. Wouldn’t you rather experience yourself as the creator of your life than as a “better” creation?
If you haven’t yet eliminated at least one of your limiting self-esteem beliefs using the Lefkoe Belief Process, go to htp://www.recreateyourlife.com/free where you can eliminate one limiting belief free.
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Copyright © 2010 Morty Lefkoe