I’ve learned a bunch of things since I was first diagnosed with metastatic colon cancer a few weeks ago. One that I want to share with you is my realization on a whole new level that I’m more than what I do.

Sign of love (seamless people silhouette)On some level I’ve known that for many years. I’ve had a sense for a long time that who I really am is some type of Universal Consciousness that has manifested as Morty the creation. I have been able to stop any attachment to my work so that my self-esteem is not based on what I accomplish (or don’t). So I am quite clear that I am more than my beliefs, my behavior, my feelings and my body.

And yet I feel my proudest accomplishments are things I’ve done, like being a great father, a really good husband, and making a difference in literally tens of thousands of lives using The Lefkoe Method.

I am still proud of what I’ve done, but I now realize in a way I never did before that I also am proud of who I am, how I “be” in the world.

Experiencing and expressing unconditional love

I have been loving people (outside my family) unconditionally for some years now and expressing that love more and more frequently, to more and more people. Sometimes in a group of people I just feel filled with love and I’m looking for someone to express it to. Obviously I feel closer to some people than others based on shared values (and there is a different quality of love for my family), but the unconditional love I feel for almost all people is very similar.

I hug people when I meet them, women and men. I often tell people verbally and in writing how much I love them.

And little by little I am inspiring others to experience the love they have for others and then express it. We had a Healing Circle at my house a couple of weeks ago attended by members of my Men’s Group and Shelly’s Woman’s Group, about 23 people. It was organized by one of the women in Shelly’s group and it was the very first time the two groups had met together.

Each person there told me what he or she loved about me. The loving energy in the room was palpable. It was an incredible experience, one that everyone should have. At one point in the evening I said to the group: I really do appreciate your expression of love for me, but you should be able to express that love to anyone you feel it for without needing them to develop a potentially serious illness. (I know that my diagnosis is considered serious by oncologists, but I still have given no meaning to the diagnosis and am certain that I will be fine and continue my work and my life for many years to come.)

In other words, get in touch with your love for other people. Then let people you love know how much you love them. It feels good both to express that love and to receive it.

By the way, it’s possible to love people who resist it and who don’t return your love. Unconditional love is just that: unconditional. But something feels more complete when your love is accepted; it’s almost like closing a circle. So being open to receive people’s love is a gift to them, because it enables them to experience their love being gotten on the other end.

I’m as excited about my “being” as my “doing”

It was during the meeting at my house that I realized in a powerful new way that, despite receiving literally thousands of testimonials from people whose lives have transformed as a result of the work they have done using The Lefkoe Method, my favorite testimonial came from my friend Joe Vitalle a few years ago when he told me, “You are the most loving man I’ve ever met.” Joe’s comment was an important part of my recent realization that my open expression of unconditional love could be as healing as my ability to help people eliminate beliefs and dissolve meaning.

For example, one of my best friends felt uncomfortable when I first started telling him how much I loved him. I signed my emails to him: “Love, Morty.” He would sign his emails with just his name. After a while he started signing his emails: “Love, …” And now he just sends me notes: “I love you.”

I am as proud and excited that I have been able to inspire him to experience and express his love openly and freely as I am for helping a client get rid of depression or emotional eating.

What’s the status of your loving?

Two parting questions you should answer for yourself right now:

  1. Do you allow yourself to fully experience love for other people?
  2. And if you do, do you express it openly so the recipient knows you love him/her?

One more question: If your answer is “no” to either question, are you satisfied with your answer?

AN UPDATE ON MY CANCER:

I’m back in my office this week. I will be going to the Block Center for Integrative Cancer Treatment for my colon cancer treatment. Dr. Keith Block comes closer to what I want in his holistic approach to helping people cure their cancer than anyone else I could find.

I will fly to Chicago every other Monday for ten more rounds of chemo and return Thursday afternoons. If my condition changes along the way, they will modify the protocol.

I was a little tired over the weekend from the chemo, but no nausea and my appetite is very good. I’m feeling excellent today.

I feel very good about my treatment and expect to recover fully.   I am still not giving meaning to anything they tell me, including the potential side effects of the various chemicals I am taking. (You don’t want to read them; they are almost as bad as the cancer itself!) I am really fortunate that I created a way to dissolve meaning automatically before the cancer showed up. It is making a profound difference in my life to be able to deal with my condition without any stress.

Finally, I love reading the hundreds of messages of love and support. They really do make a difference to me; I appreciate hearing from you. Thanks for loving me. I love you too.

 

Thanks for reading my blog. Please post your questions or comments on the value of experiencing and expressing your love for others. Disagreement is as welcome as agreement. Your comments add value for thousands of readers. I love to read them all and I will respond to as many as I can.

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If you haven’t yet eliminated at least one of your limiting self-esteem beliefs using the Lefkoe Belief Process, go to http://www.recreateyourlife.com where you can eliminate several limiting beliefs free.

Copyright © 2014 Morty Lefkoe