You set a goal. You write it down. You feel that rush of excitement.
This time will be different.
And for a while, it is. You take action. You make progress. Things are actually happening.
But then… something shifts.
Maybe fear creeps in. Maybe you hit an obstacle that feels insurmountable. Or maybe you just lose that initial spark of enthusiasm and can’t seem to get it back.
Sound familiar?
Here’s what I want you to know: You’re not broken. You’re not lazy. And you’re not the only one.
In fact, most people who set goals end up abandoning them. According to the journal Clinical Psychology, over 40% of adults will try to change their behavior at some point this year—and 92% will fail to keep their commitment.
But here’s the thing—it’s not because goal-setting doesn’t work. It’s because something invisible is working against you.
That something? Your beliefs.
Why Goals Get Derailed
Let me tell you about someone I know—I’ll call her Sarah. She was a cartoonist. A really talented one. She had an email list full of people who loved her work. She’d created an entire course on cartooning that she was excited to share.
She was literally one step away from hitting “send” on that email.
But she couldn’t do it.
She’d sit at her computer, finger hovering over the mouse, and… nothing. She’d close her laptop and walk away. Day after day.
When she talked about what was happening, the truth came out: She was terrified it would fail. That people wouldn’t buy it. That she wasn’t good enough to teach others. That if she put herself out there and failed, everyone would see she was a fraud.
So instead of risking rejection, she did… nothing.
And this is what happens to so many of us. We get this close to something we really want, and then we stop.
The Three Ways Beliefs Sabotage Your Goals
There are three main ways beliefs derail even the most motivated people:
First, fear stops you in your tracks.
You start taking action, but then you get scared. The closer you get to the finish line, the more you think about what could go wrong. What if I fail? What if people judge me? What if I’m not capable?
These questions aren’t random. They come from beliefs like:
- I’m not good enough
- I’m not capable
- If I fail, I’ll be rejected
And when these beliefs are active, it feels safer to do nothing than to risk proving them true.
Second, when you hit obstacles, your beliefs convince you to quit.
You’re making progress, and then you hit a wall. Something doesn’t work the way you expected. It’s harder than you thought it would be.
And instead of seeing this as a normal part of any journey, you see it as proof. Proof that you just don’t have what it takes. Proof that you’re not capable. Proof that you’re not good at this particular thing.
I worked with a facilitator who helped high school students eliminate the belief “I’m not good at math.” Before getting rid of that belief, those students would hit a difficult problem and immediately give up. See? I knew I couldn’t do this. But after eliminating that belief? They kept going. They used the same persistence they brought to their other subjects.
The obstacle didn’t change. Their response to the obstacle changed.
Third, you’re not flexible enough when things don’t go as planned.
Here’s the thing: No plan survives contact with reality unchanged.
But some people grip their original plan so tightly that even when the world is showing them it’s not working, they keep pushing. They keep trying to force the square peg into the round hole.
Think about PayPal. They started as a mobile payment solution—but this was the late 1990s. Mobile phones couldn’t handle what they were trying to do. But when they created a web demo just to show people what they were building, that demo took off. People loved it.
So what did they do? They pivoted. They became a web payment solution instead.
Now imagine if they’d said, “No, we’re committed to mobile payments. That’s the plan.” They would’ve been just another failed startup.
The same thing happens to individuals. You create a strategy for reaching your goal, but when it’s not working, you can’t let it go. You keep pushing because you believe your way is the right way.
Why? Usually because of beliefs like:
- What makes me good enough is being right
- What makes me good enough is doing things perfectly
- Mistakes are bad
When you have these beliefs, flexibility feels like failure. So you stick with what’s not working… and your goal slips further and further away.
Your Behavior Isn’t a Mystery
Here’s what I want you to take away from this:
Your failures can be explained.
When you set a goal and don’t reach it, it’s not because something is fundamentally wrong with you. It’s not because you lack willpower or discipline or intelligence.
It’s because beliefs are running in the background, sabotaging your efforts without you even realizing it.
The good news? Once you know the diagnosis, you know the cure.
The diagnosis is: beliefs are stopping you.
The cure is: get rid of them.
I’ve seen this happen so many times. People who were stuck for years finally eliminate the beliefs holding them back, and suddenly they’re free to move forward—without that paralyzing fear telling them they’d be destroyed if things didn’t go perfectly.
Take Cliff Brackett, for example. He looked at his business numbers—comparing a 12-week period to the same period the year before. His sales were up 29%. But here’s what really mattered: his net profit was up 200%.
What changed? As Cliff put it, “By eliminating the belief systems that were developed by an abused and neglected child and developing the belief systems of a healthy and mature adult, I have been able to make choices in my life that are getting me the results that I want in my life.”
That’s what happens when beliefs shift. You don’t just feel different. Your actual results change. The choices you make change. What you’re willing to try changes. And the life you’re living transforms.
What This Means for You
Think about a goal you’ve set recently—or one you set a while ago that you’ve quietly abandoned.
Where did you get stuck?
Did fear creep in right before you were about to take a big step?
Did you hit an obstacle and take it as a sign that you just weren’t meant to do this?
Did you create a plan and refuse to adjust it, even when it clearly wasn’t working?
Whatever happened, I promise you: there’s a belief underneath it.
And the beautiful thing about beliefs is that once you see them for what they are—just old interpretations you made as a child, not the truth—they can disappear.
When they do, you get to experience something remarkable: the freedom to act without that constant voice of doubt holding you back.
Your Next Step
If you’re tired of setting goals and not reaching them, if you’re ready to figure out what’s really been in your way all these years, I’d love to talk with you.
I offer free strategy sessions where we can get clear on what you really want, identify the patterns that have been holding you back, and explore whether working together might be right for you.
You can book a free strategy session here: https://www.mortylefkoe.com/free-strategy-2/
And if you haven’t tried it yet, we also have a free belief elimination program that walks you through the process of getting rid of a limiting belief. You can try it here: http://recreateyourlife.com/free/
Something that truly felt true can feel untrue—or just plain empty. I’ve seen it happen hundreds of times.
And I’d love for you to experience it too.
