While a coach drilled his lifeguards at one end of the pool, something strange was happening at the other end … and none of them saw it.
A 14-year-old boy had been quietly running his own routine: jump into the pool, climb out, strip off a Speedo, toss it into the water. Over and over. By the time the coach wrapped up his last exercise, several soggy swimsuits were floating at the far end of the pool.
The coach turned his lifeguards away from the water and asked, “How many Speedos did the boy leave in the water?” They were dumbfounded. “What boy?” They had been locked onto their coach the entire time, completely blind to everything else.
The prank had a purpose. The coach wasn’t just having fun. He was training his lifeguards to scan the full environment, not just the focal point in front of them. In open water, a drowning swimmer rarely thrashes. They go quiet. A lifeguard locked onto one spot will miss them entirely.
That same kind of awareness applies to our inner world. Most of us move through the day like those lifeguards, so focused outward that we lose track of what’s moving through us. We run on autopilot. Awareness gives us a moment between feeling and reacting … and that moment is where the occurring process works.
But how do you increase your emotional awareness?
You simply get into the habit of asking one question – What am I feeling now? Then you answer the question. Repeat this several times a day and for several weeks and emotional awareness becomes a habit. Yes, it is that simple.
But of course, we don’t stop there
When we teach the Lefkoe Occurring Course, we start out by helping people become aware of emotions, then aware of the meanings that lead to them. And in those early steps, people often start to experience some small changes. They notice just a bit more freedom. They haven’t reached the heights they’ll get by the end of the course, but they are already starting to see progress.
You can start this process yourself by asking a few times each day, “What am I feeling right now?” then put your emotions into words. As you do that, you’ll notice awareness of your feelings grow. You can then take the next step to ask, “What event is this feeling about?” and “What meaning did I give to those events?”
Recently, I had an opportunity to use this process myself
It was Friday night, and I was enjoying the last day in Hawaii with my daughter and grandson.
Even though I would miss them, I was looking forward to helping my friend Marci put on a wedding shower for 35 people on Sunday. She and I were going to do all the food, decorations, and preparations. It was a huge job, and I wanted to be there for Marci because she has been such an amazing friend to me over the years.
But at 11:30 pm, I got a troubling text from the airline – flight canceled. If I couldn’t get home in time, I wouldn’t be able to help Marci. I started to panic.
I asked, “What am I feeling?” Answer: Anxious.
“What meaning am I giving?” Answer: I won’t be home in time to help Marci. I’ll leave her in the lurch to put together the shower all by herself.
While I held this meaning, it was hard to focus. It was hard to think. It was nearly impossible to problem solve. But then I remembered to dissolve the meaning. I realized I couldn’t know for sure whether I’d make it home in time for the shower. A feeling of calm came over me. I then called another airline and got a flight home on time.
Did I make it to the shower? Yes. And I was calm and collected, too, because I noticed my feeling, dissolved the meaning, and came back to the present.
What I’ve done is not remarkable; you can do it too
To gain this ability, first start asking yourself the question periodically, “What am I feeling?” to develop greater awareness of emotions. Then practice the other steps. Do this regularly and slowly your life will change.
Try dissolving a meaning today about what is happening now or a recent event, then leave a comment on our blog letting us know.
We’d love to hear from you.
How to dissolve negative feelings in seconds (and make it a compelling habit)
Life brings us all big and small storms that can keep us from experiencing total joy. Wouldn’t it be great if we could somehow be a bit more like the eye of the hurricane, unaffected by the chaos around us?
Fortunately, we created a way to do just that called the Lefkoe Occurring Course. In that course, you learn how to dissolve unwanted emotions in seconds. Then you make dissolving emotions a habit. You see reality with much greater clarity. As a result, positive and uplifting emotions tend to occur naturally.
You can register for the Lefkoe Occurring Course in August. However, to do that, you first need to join the waiting list here: https://www.mortylefkoe.com/lfc/lfc-2-0-waiting-list/
While you wait, you’ll get several goodies teaching you more about how to dissolve unwanted feelings. So please join today and use what you learn to help yourself and contribute to others.
