The question frequently arises: How can I tell the difference between occurrings and the following other phenomena that seem like occurrings?

  • making conscious assessments about the events,
  • positive thinking (affirmations),
  • random thoughts,
  • alternative interpretations, and
  • intuition I have about events.

Let me briefly describe each and explain how each is different.  If you are able to distinguish your occurrings from the other phenomena and dissolve the occurrings, you can create your moment-to-moment experience of life. 

bigstock-Silhouette-With-Thought-Bubble-3.19.13To begin with, let me explain what I mean by “reality/events”:

Events are what actually happens in the world.  What you know through your five senses, especially what you can see or hear.  What you usually could capture on a video recording.  Sometimes “reality” can’t be “seen” because it is inside your mind, such as thoughts, memories, projections of the future, and physical sensations.  We can give meaning to both external and internal reality, in other words, to events that occur “out there in the world” and to those that happen in your mind.

All the phenomena listed above are different ways of relating to reality/events.

Occurrings

Occurrings are meanings that you have automatically and unconsciously given to events as they happen.  A critical aspect of occurrings is that they feel like “the truth” to us.  They seem like part of “reality” to us.  We have to look carefully to distinguish them from actual events in reality.  I’ve written about occurrings on several occasions before.  See especially https://www.mortylefkoe.com/important-improve-life/#.

Conscious Assessments

Occurrings are very different from conscious assessments—which consist of consciously looking at reality and asking ourselves: What are some of the possible implications of, and what would be the best way to deal with, the events?  For example, imagine a friend walked in a room you were in and didn’t say hello or even acknowledge your presence.  One possible occurring might be: He is angry with me.  If that were your occurring, it would seem to you as if he really is angry with you.

After dissolving the occurring you would realize that all that actually happened is he walked in and didn’t pay attention to you.  Then could you consciously ask yourself: What could his behavior possibly mean?  You might conclude that it could mean he is angry, or he is distracted, or upset and doesn’t want to talk to anyone, or deep in thought and doesn’t want to get off track, etc.  At which point you could deal with the reality of what actually happened by walking over to the friend and asking if he is okay, or by waiting until later if you think waiting would make sense.

An assessment about an event that is made consciously—that is clearly an assumption and doesn’t feel like the truth—is different from an occurring, which is made unconsciously and which does feel like the truth.

When you act on a conscious assessment you realize you do not know for sure what an event really meant or the best way to deal with it, so you investigate to find out.  When you act on an occurring, you are certain what an event meant because you perceive your occurring as reality.

And because occurrings are always meanings that exist only in your mind, acting as if they are The Truth is likely to get you into trouble.

Positive thinking (affirmations)

Positive thinking is an attempt to convince yourself of something positive when you really think something negative.  In other words, with affirmations you don’t dissolve a negative occurring and then create a positive meaning in its place; instead you try to cover the negative occurring with a positive thought through force and repetition.

The theory is if you say something enough times with sufficient positive energy behind it, you will convince yourself that it is true.  Unfortunately this rarely works.  You still have your original negative occurring underneath the positive affirmation, which will affect your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors.

In fact, the very act of saying to yourself in the mirror: “I am good enough,” over and over often creates the opposite effect to the one you want.  Why?  Because people who really thought they were good enough would not be standing in front of a mirror trying to convince themselves of that.  The only people who would take that type of action are people who really didn’t think they are were good enough and were trying to convince themselves otherwise.  In other words, the very act of saying repeatedly that “I am good enough” actually implies that I am not.

Positive thinking, which is an attempt to convince yourself of something you feel isn’t true, has nothing to do with dissolving occurrings or forming conscious assessments.

Alternative Interpretations

The purpose of using alternative interpretations is to realize that the meaning you gave an event is not “the truth,” but only one of several possible interpretations.  You are not trying to convince yourself that any of the alternative interpretations is correct and your meaning is wrong.  By definition, an occurring seems to us to be the truth, part of reality, a fact.  Alternative interpretations help us to realize that an occurring is only one of many possible ways to view an event and is not the truth.

Random thoughts

The primary difference between a random thought and an occurring is that the occurring seems like it is reality—it seems like the truth.  A thought is usually seen as just an idea in our mind and does not necessarily seem to be the truth.  Occurrings are always related to events, in other words, they are the meaning we give specific events.  Thoughts are not necessarily related to anything.  Moreover, just like we have certainty about reality, we have certainty about our occurrings, which we think are the truth.  When we have thoughts we don’t assume they are the truth.  A thought usually would not produce an emotion, an occurring often does.

Intuition

Another phenomenon that can be confused with occurrings is intuition.  Intuition is a type of knowing that usually doesn’t depend on the five senses; it is a feeling about something that seems to be true.  According to Wikipedia, it is “the ability to acquire knowledge without inference or the use of reason.” Because an intuitive thought can seem like the meaning you are giving an event, it can be difficult to distinguish between intuitive thoughts and an occurring.

Usually intuitive thoughts don’t have the certainty that occurrings do, although in some situations they might.  I think that after making a concerted effort to identify occurrings and distinguishing them from events several hundred times, you will get to the point where they “feel different” from intuition.

But you still might not always know the difference.  Even if you are not always able to distinguish occurrings from intuition, you can always make it a practice to distinguish both occurrings and intuition from reality and then consider anything other than reality something that needs to be taken as tentative and investigated further.

Obviously if it can be dissolved using the Lefkoe Occurring Process, then it likely is an occurring and not intuition.

Copyright © 2011-13 Morty Lefkoe

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10 Comments

  1. Therese April 16, 2013 at 3:39 am - Reply

    Thanks for the information of intuition vs ocurrings. I have found I can distinguish an intuition if I find myself arguing with it. It is as if the source is from outside myself. I have also learnt that asking questions to gather more information also helps this distinction. Often an intuition has a feeling in the body, in a particular place. I usually get a very strong feeling in my chest, and a sense of knowing. Asking questions has been the most helpful to define the accuracy of an intuition.

  2. Ramiro March 22, 2013 at 4:14 am - Reply

    Morty,

    What’s the difference between occurring and perspective? Thanks.

    • Morty Lefkoe March 22, 2013 at 8:13 am - Reply

      Hi Ramiron,

      I’m not sure what you mean by perspective.

      Love, Morty

      Love,Morty

      • Ramiro March 25, 2013 at 5:51 pm - Reply

        You said that “occurring” is how the world occurs to you, how a situation appears to be to you. That’s the definition of “perspective” as far as I understand it. So, following your own definitions, what difference do you see between those two terms? Is there a difference between “occurring” and “perspective”?

        • Morty Lefkoe March 26, 2013 at 7:38 am - Reply

          Hi Ramiro,

          If you define the two terms the same way, then they mean the same thing. By your definition of perspective, occurring is the same.

          Love, Morty

          • Ramiro March 26, 2013 at 3:52 pm

            I see. You seem to support the idea of understanging things for what they are as opposed to getting lost using labels and terms without fully understanding what they are. I prefer the former.

  3. Scott March 20, 2013 at 12:23 pm - Reply

    Morty, this might be the best blog post about Occurings yet. I admit I have struggled with understanding exactly what you mean when it comes dissolving meanings, but this helps me understand a lot better. I’m looking forward to taking the Lefkoe Occurring Course when I’m better suited financially.

    I love your blog posts and hope you continue to share your wisdom! You are making a big difference in my life! Thank you so much!

  4. Janet Robinson March 20, 2013 at 11:03 am - Reply

    Thank you for this post Morty. It really puts a good definition on occurrings. Being able to look at our occurrings and decide how helpful they are, is the answer to living consciously. Intuition is something so precious and magical. It only requires us to be conscious of it.

  5. James March 20, 2013 at 7:28 am - Reply

    Great observation about affirmations; they often incite a shouting match inside the mind. At least the relevant ones do!

    I think that can be of great use for us. If I’m trying to root out “I’m not good enough,” affirming “I am good enough” will provoke occurrings that line up with “I’m not good enough.”

    The error with affirmations is to think that they are about belief. You don’t have to believe the affirmation in order for it to work! A hypothetical: Joe believes, “There’s not enough money.” That makes him feel bad, it makes him want to give up and blow what he has. It’s neither useful, nor pleasant. He affirms “There’s plenty of money” until he starts to notice a few things that match with that: He could cancel the extra services he’s not using; he could rent out his old car and extra bedroom; Uncle Joe needs help with his taxes and he could do it. Now, he still doesn’t believe there’s enough money, but he DOES notice that this new thoughts are much more worthwhile, because it draws his attention to the money that exists and is available.

    Examples are conjecture and hypothesis rather than confirmed theory. However, based on this conjecture, I project it’s going to be worthwhile to affirm, “There’s plenty of money available.” Is that an occurring, a thought, an intuition, or an assessment?

  6. Bianca March 20, 2013 at 6:44 am - Reply

    Dear Morty,
    thank you for your wisdom! I have learnt so much from your posts. My life has become easier and more fun because of your method. Now most of the time, when something happens, I do not have any occurings anymore or if I feel one coming up, I immediately surround my occuring with lots of other possible meanings, thus taking the sting completely out of it. But I was wondering what the next step should be. I mean: you can not go through life seeing everything as a string of meaningless events! Sometimes (not always) it is worthwhile to know if someone has a reason for what they are doing and what that could mean for you. If another colleague gets a job you wanted, it is nice not to feel occurings like: “o, this means my boss hates me” or “I am totally useless”. But there IS probably a reason for it. This may be a totally irrelevant one (this choice suits the organisation better) but it might also be one that is relevant to you like: “I did not even know you were interested” or “you are not good enough (yet!)” or even “yes, I hate you and like your colleague much better”. Once you know, you can take the appropriate action: make yourself more visible – work/study harder – kick him in the shins and find another job. :) So I understand your message to be: don’t assume, GO ASK!
    Love,
    B.

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