For the past couple of months my main focus has been preparing a TEDx talk that I delivered in Hoboken, NJ last Friday, June 28.  TEDx is the local version of the TED talks that are given annually in Long Beach, CA and that feature some of the most interesting people in the world, talking about “ideas worth spreading.”  You can find hundreds of incredible TED talks, each a maximum of 18 minutes, at

Tedxcrop-070213So it was a real honor to be invited to present at a TEDx event.  I talked about suffering—how suffering is the result of the negative emotions we feel all day long, which in turn come from the meaning we unconsciously and automatically give to meaningless events.  And how it is possible to quickly and easily dissolve that meaning … and stop your suffering.

The talk will be posted on You Tube in a few weeks and I’ll provide you with the link when it is up.  In the meantime, here is a sneak preview of what I said.  If you do what I suggest, I promise it will profoundly change your life.

Suffering is not inevitable. The Buddha recognized that it is not our pain that causes our suffering.  It is the meaning we attribute to the pain that causes our suffering. Meanings like:  I can’t do that.  My boss will be upset. They’ll laugh at me.  She’s angry with me.  I screwed up again. … Sound familiar?

What if it were possible for us to stop giving meanings like these to events, thereby stopping our emotional suffering?

You don’t have to imagine it.  There actually is a way to quickly and easily dissolve the meaning we unconsciously and automatically give events all day long.   And before I’m finished today you all will have learned how to do it.

In the middle of the talk I taught them how to dissolve meaning.  I’ve explained how in a number of blog posts, including

But knowing how to dissolve meaning is useless if you don’t do it.  So here’s what to do.  Whenever you notice a negative emotion of any kind, ask yourself what happened just prior to the emotion and what is the meaning you gave that event that caused the emotion.  Then make a clear distinction between the event and the meaning you gave it.  That’s it.  As soon as you get that the meaning is not part of the event, that it is only in your mind, it will dissolve.  And as soon as it dissolves, any negative emotions it had caused will disappear instantaneously.  And when the emotions disappear, your suffering stops.

I’ve discovered something fascinating after teaching hundreds of people how to do this exercise:  If you set an alarm 14 times a day, for 10 weeks—about 1,000 times—and you dissolve whatever meaning you discover every time your alarm rings, you get to the point where you automatically dissolve the meaning you’ve given to events.

And remember: when you dissolve your meaning, you stop your suffering.

We all can experience real, deep inner peace—in just a few weeks—if we learn to dissolve meaning automatically.  Despite what many people think, daily suffering is not a part of human nature.

Can you even imagine what your life and the life of everyone else on this planet would be like without negative emotions—without suffering—every day? … If we stopped giving meaning, no one would ever experience himself as a victim.  If we stopped giving meaning, no one would ever feel anxious when things didn’t turn out the way she wanted them to.  If we stopped giving meaning, no one would ever get upset by his circumstances. 

Dissolve your meaning, stop your suffering.

I learned how to dissolve meaning a few years ago and it stopped my suffering.  Then I taught it to a few hundred people and most of them tell me it has stopped their suffering.  So I decided that I had to tell you.

Because if they can do it, so can you.  Take just a moment and think about where you could stop suffering in your life if you dissolved your meanings.  In your relationships.  With your children.  At work.

And if you can do it, so can everyone else in the world.  Do you know anyone who feels victimized?  Tell them.  Do you know anyone who feels frequent anger, anxiety and upset?  Tell them.  Do you know parents who get upset with their children because of the meaning they give their children’s behavior.  Tell them.  Tell your friends and family, tell your children, tell everyone that they no longer need to suffer. 

This is an idea that’s worth spreading.

I am committed to having a world in which you and the other 7 billion people on this planet dissolve your meaning … and stop your suffering.

For more information on the process I presented in my TEDx talk, click here.


Thanks for reading my blog.  Please post your questions or comments about suffering and how to dissolve meaning.  Your comments will add value for thousands of readers.  I read them all and respond to as many as I can.

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Copyright © 2013 Morty Lefkoe


  1. Ramakrishna. palthya July 3, 2013 at 8:50 pm - Reply

    There are many kinds of sufferings. Budda prechs that the main cause for suffering is wants and greedy in nature. Mr. Morty thinking in this fashion is quite appreciable.

  2. Sam July 3, 2013 at 6:41 pm - Reply

    Some time ago, I said that Morty is using Buddhist wisdom and methods for commercial gain. “it’s not the pain, it’s the meaning we attach to pain” is just one among many truths expounded by Buddha, who also gave many techniques for living and dying.

    Making a business out of such things is dodgy.

    • Morty Lefkoe July 3, 2013 at 8:47 pm - Reply

      Hi Sam,

      After talking to Buddhist scholars, I am not aware of anything in Buddhism that teaches you a technique that enables you to stop giving meaning in just a few weeks. In fact, if you do the exercises I teach, you get to the point in a couple of months (not years) of dissolving meaning automatically.

      And if people can get what I teach from reading Buddhism, they can choose to do that.

      Thanks for writing.

      Love, Morty

  3. Rocky July 3, 2013 at 10:57 am - Reply

    This is all very meaningful and worthy of telling as many people as possible. My question is – what about the physical pain we attribute to emotional upset? In my life like all others, there has been much work in removing suffering from life consequences, but I’ve also felt the suffering physically. In my heart, in my shoulder blades, what have you…what to do about those problems? Is it possible to think that once we remove suffering in the mind and it’s something that you do naturally that we will physically feel better as well?

    • Morty Lefkoe July 10, 2013 at 2:36 pm - Reply

      Hi Rocky,

      A large part of the experience of physical pain is the meaning we give it. You actually can reduce the intensity of physical pain if you stop giving it meaning.

      Love, Morty

  4. Jerome Ratliff July 3, 2013 at 9:34 am - Reply

    Thank you so much for sharing this. I especially like the insightful reminder that it’s not the pain but the meaning we attribute to the pain. I look forward to seeing the video.

  5. Lyn July 3, 2013 at 5:36 am - Reply

    YAY, Morty!!

  6. tuesday July 3, 2013 at 4:45 am - Reply

    Morty – Thnaks and looking forward to this
    Did you feel nervous before the Ted talk?

    On some occasion could you write about what the purpose of giving meaning might be – even if it is deluded?
    It is such a universal unconcious habit that I assume that we have evolved to do it for some reason.

    And what about the positive meaning we give things – do you lose them too?

    • Lyn July 3, 2013 at 5:40 am - Reply

      I think we give meaning to things so that we can make sense of our world. We develop (or learn) a set of beliefs (judgements) whereby we gauge things that happen against those beliefs.

  7. French Press Bob July 3, 2013 at 4:28 am - Reply

    Why not show us the video? Or is it a secret video?

    • Morty Lefkoe July 3, 2013 at 7:09 am - Reply


      I will show you the video as soon as it is available. It usually takes about a month before it is posted on You Tube by the TED staff.

      Love, Morty

  8. siwen July 3, 2013 at 4:06 am - Reply

    It is an amzing blog. In this blog, it also provides me a new method! Thank you Morty~


  9. Mala July 3, 2013 at 1:21 am - Reply

    Wow Morty! That’s great, TED is an amazing project. I’m so pleased for you and thank you so much for all you offer – my finances are at rock bottom otherwise I would purchase your entire program – you are one of a few people I’ve been following who have truly inspired me – I am now about to embark on a retraining at 41 in neuropsychology – I really appreciate your genuine approach.
    Best Regards, Mala

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