Why do we usually make up a meaning for events that have no inherent meaning? And how does that automatic, unconscious meaning-making process create problems for us?

Why we need to create meaning

As a human being, your survival is conditional—it is not guaranteed. In other words, there are some things that help insure your survival and some things that threaten your survival. As a very young child, having loving, caring parents makes us feel our survival is insured; having parents who do not love or care about us (or who we feel do not love or care about us) makes us feel our survival is threatened. As an adult having someone on a dark street stick a gun in your face and demand your money makes you feel as if your survival is threatened.

Human beings seem to have a hard-wired “meaning making” mechanism that judges almost everything: conducive to my survival or inimical to my survival—for me or against me. One of the first words that children learn, and then repeat incessantly, is “why.” We need to understand what is happening and why so we can better judge the effect it might have on our lives.

The need to discover an event’s probable impact on us leads us to look for the meaning in events that have no inherent meaning. As I’ve explained in earlier posts and as is clear to anyone who has eliminated at least one belief using the Lefkoe Belief Process, no event has an inherent meaning because any event could have a multitude of meanings and you can’t ever draw any conclusions, for sure, from any event. Meaning exists only in the mind, not in the world.

For example, if parents get angry when their children didn’t meet their expectations, most children will assign such behavior the meaning that they aren’t good enough. In fact, however, the fact that parents are angry at their child tells you nothing for certain about their child. As a result, you can’t know anything for certain about a child from the fact that his parents frequently got angry at him. In other words, the events involving the parents and children have no inherent meaning.

We create two different types of meaning

There are two fundamental types of meaning we give to events:

The first type is the meaning we give to a pattern of events, such as mom and dad being busy a lot of the time (leading to: I’m not important) or mom and dad arguing a lot and getting divorced (leading to: Relationships don’t work). These meanings become beliefs, which are generalized statements about ourselves, people and life that stay with us forever unless we find some way to eliminate the belief. Such beliefs are often variations of “I am …, or “People are …, or “Life is ….” Beliefs are statements about reality that we feel are “the truth,” thereby determining our behavior.

The second type is the meaning we give to specific events, both external (events in the world) or internal (such as thoughts, feelings, memories, physical sensations, etc.). These meanings last only as long as our focus on an event lasts. Like beliefs, such meanings are created unconsciously and automatically. The meaning we give this type of event determines how it “occurs” for us. Most of us most of the time never distinguish between actual events and how the events occur to us. We think the latter is real and therefore we deal with the “occurring” as if it is the actual reality.

In other words, if a friend walks into a room and doesn’t speak to us, and this event occurs to us as: my friend doesn’t like me, it seems to us as if the reality is my friend doesn’t like me. At which point we deal with this person as if he really doesn’t like me, when all we know for sure is that when he walked into the room he did not talk to us. In other words, because we usually don’t distinguish between an event and the meaning we give the event, we deal with the meaning as if it is what actually happened.

Ultimately, both types of meanings (beliefs and our occurrings) get substituted for reality in our mind and we don’t deal with what really is. In other words, we think our beliefs and occurrings are “the truth.”

Getting rid of these meanings

When you eliminate beliefs, you create new possibilities in your life because “your reality” has changed. The filters through which you view reality are gone. Barriers to action, such as procrastination and anxiety, have been permanently eliminated.

When you dissolve the meaning/occurring you give events moment by moment, you are better able to deal with the situation (if it needs dealing with) because you are clear on the difference between the event to be dealt with and the meaning that exists only in your mind. So you are able to see more possibilities for solving a problem. Moreover, because meaningless events cannot cause feelings, most of our negative emotions, such as anxiety and anger, come from the meaning you give events. By dissolving the meaning, you simultaneously dissolve the negative feelings.

Dissolve beliefs and occurrings by making a distinction

As I pointed out in an earlier blog post, we think our beliefs and the meaning we give events moment by moment are true because of a distinction we failed to make earlier, namely between the event(s) and the meaning we assign the event(s). Therefore, the way to eliminate or dissolve beliefs and current meanings is to make the distinction we did not make earlier. When we are able to make that distinction, the belief and the current meaning/occurring disappear.

When people are told they can eliminate beliefs, some respond: But won’t that force me to do things that might be dangerous, for example, if I eliminate the belief life is dangerous, won’t that make me oblivious to some real dangers. The answer is no. Eliminating beliefs does not make you do anything. It only offers new possibilities, from which you can freely choose.

A similar thing happens when I tell people that they can learn to stop giving meaning to events. One person asked: Won’t that lead to people becoming sociopaths? What he meant was: if your have no feelings, won’t you stop caring about other people? Won’t you lose all sense of morality? Again, the answer is no.

Not giving an arbitrary meaning to moment-to-moment events does not affect your values at all. You can still value human life and have a desire to alleviate the suffering of others.

In addition, you do not need meaning to get you to take action. If you lose your job, you don’t need to assume it means that you will not be able to pay your bills, that you will lose your home, that you will never get another job, etc. in order to start looking for a new job. In fact, you will be better able to create strategies for finding a new job if you are not overwhelmed with the fear that would result from such occurrings.

How can I decide what to do without any meaning?

But if nature built a meaning-making mechanism into us because we need to know if what we encounter in reality is conducive to or threatens our survival, how will we be able to survive if we stop making meaning?

There is a significant difference between making reasonable assumptions that we know are assumptions and that we continually check for accuracy, and unknowingly giving meaning to an event and then thinking that the way the event occurred to us is what actually happened. We can never be better off by being blind to what actually is.

Automatic meaning-making might be useful in a world where real danger lurks beneath every bush, where a saber-tooth tiger might jump out at you at any moment. In such a world, we need to automatically give meaning to events and respond without conscious thought. We are better being safe than sorry and assuming the worst will probably save our lives at some point.

But we no longer live in a world where we need automatic, unconscious meaning. In virtually every situation we have the time to carefully think about events and consciously determine their most likely meaning—all the while realizing that our consciously-created meanings are provisional and need to be checked for usefulness from time to time. We know they are our best guesses at that time and do not mistake them for the truth.

In today’s modern world, thinking your beliefs and occurrings are “the truth” can never be useful. So eliminate your limiting beliefs and learn how to stop automatically giving meaning to current events. You’ll be surprised at how much happier and more successful you will become.

What do you think about our biological need to create meaning and how not giving meaning to events enables us to have a better life? I’d love to read your comments and questions.

If you haven’t yet eliminated at least one of your limiting self-esteem beliefs using the Lefkoe Belief Process, go to http://www.recreateyourlife.com/free where you can eliminate one negative belief free.

For information about eliminating 23 of the most common limiting beliefs and conditionings, which cause eight of the most common problems in our lives, and get a separate video of the WAIR? Process, please check out: http://recreateyourlife.com/naturalconfidence.

These weekly blog posts also exist as podcasts. Sign up for the RSS feed or at iTunes to get the podcasts sent to you weekly.

copyright ©2011 Morty Lefkoe

48 Comments

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  2. Kathryn July 2, 2014 at 6:08 am - Reply

    Morty, are you attempting to debate mother nature here? If what you’re saying is true, that we live in a world where the ability to assign automatic meaning is no longer needed, don’t you think we would have evolved out of it by now? Obviously, there
    are still many humans who need this ability, and I’m not just talking about African tribes. I understand your intentions. But, I think happiness and “success” are sometimes unrealistic goals. We have to accept our negative emotions, as they are the contrast that gives our positive emotions so much.. well.. positivity! Without them, we cannot see what we truly value and what is important to us. Sometimes it feels good to have a nice cry. Just sayin. If our idea of “success” is simply to FEEL, to breathe and be human, and experience everything in the moment, and live a vibrant life, then success becomes much easier to attain. Redefine your values and stop chasing things you don’t really want.

  3. Alex February 25, 2014 at 12:33 pm - Reply

    dude, I think I have the belief that if I live without meaning I’ll become a sociopath, maybe that’s why I don’t dissolve as much meaning as I could. I’ll eliminate it and see what happens

    • Morty Lefkoe February 25, 2014 at 1:55 pm - Reply

      Hi Alex,

      Eliminate it and let me know what happens.

      Love, Morty

  4. john September 16, 2013 at 5:29 pm - Reply

    It’s so silly how you include ‘love’ in your signature. The kind of world you posit is not one of love but madness. You defy the very metaphysical laws that allow for your ability to even ‘know’ what love is… You try to pass off these objective principles as subjective tastes, like when one tastes mint chocolate chip and when they taste, they taste strawberry or rocky road. You mitigate the meaning of value and make it obsolete.

    Morty, on what basis is psychological health dependent on? It seems that all clinicians try to bring their patients to some kind of universal standard of mental health… but again, the world you postulate makes such a universal standard irrelevant… you claim that each person can achieve a sense of psychological well being on entirely different spectrums. You are ignorant of the universal principles found transculturally that constitute human flourishing. Ones’ happiness is not significantly different than another’s other than the fact that one may reach happiness on a different dimension of objectivity; meaning that some people are happier than others because their ‘subjective values’ are in tune with objective reality and the truths that such a reality intimately advocates.

    Adhere to universal values and principles or be dysfunctional, there is no relativist position, such a position only contradicts what the very nature of well-being entails. Some values truly are not as valuable as others and any wise person recognizes this. Some moral positions are truly abhorrent for the individual, the data behind violence, suicides and drug use attests to this.

    I hope if you have clients that you are preaching wisdom and not ignorance through your own liberal and ironically myopic world view.

    • Jesse Grine December 1, 2018 at 6:12 pm - Reply

      OK, now I think that this is a violent reality driven, emotion based response to what Morty was trying to depict. He is NOT saying that one should have no values, nor a belief in anything. That is to say that one should simply not be a conscious self aware human being who possess consciousness and observes events. We WERE that being, before we evolved into what we are are now, and hopefully we never fall back into that for whatever reason.
      Before we developed this consciousness, we did in fact NEED that auto meaning-making system, and it was most likely a major fundamental of our survival in the animalistic sense. Just as Morty stated above, you would need some sort of this instinct back when predators were around every turn, but that isn’t EXACTLY the same world we live in today… To be honest, it’s not the same as the world we will live in tomorrow either, nor the day after that if you think about it in context, but we will get to that.
      Morty is exactly correct in this article, and we do need to eliminate this auto meaning-making system from ourselves because it is vital to our progression as a people. We in fact need for every last one of us to eliminate this, so that we can take a step closer to achieving the big task that we have at hand. This task hasn’t been presented on the news, or in school text books and curriculum. It doesn’t have a perfume named after it or a sports team that uses it as a mascot. In fact, it portraits more of a hidden away aspect than anything else in terms of global awareness. It is something we all need to participate in, and we all need to recognize in a significant way.
      Consciousness of singularity is in fact real. We ourselves are conscious and have this sense of self and observation, and it is the little light inside of you that can speak. It is what makes us question what is fact and what is fiction in terms of meaning, and is also the reason we seek validation of others when we have an idea or theory we believe in and want to present. In our minds we think of, “how do I know if any of this is real or a dream? Or is it a computer simulation?” and then we can immediately follow that thought with the following of, “I bet it’s a dream of a computer simulation! I’m going to write this idea up and turn it in to be critiqued by the top minds of our day!”
      We contradict ourselves constantly on a daily basis. We tell ourselves that what other’s opinions of us are doesn’t matter and we need to shake it off and ignore it. Then we will take something that another person calls information as true and apply like we knew within our own personal experience that it was. This is because of singularity. We, as human existence and consciousness, are collectively one unit. Instead of focusing on changing the environment to fit certain circumstances, we need to LEARN and then EDUCATE every other person around us. We should all be striving towards the unseen in a positive united front. We will never be able to experience an existence in our 4th dimension and beyond until we realize we’re one, and act like it. Stop trolling, and start enrolling into this new and beautiful life. You create the reality before you because it is a part of you. I hope this perspective helps to get a better grasp on the bigger picture. I’m working on my book now, and I’ll hopefully have the time to do a few YouTube videos too while I’m completing it, but it should bring the rest to light for you. I’m Jesse Grine, and I thank you both for this opportunity to connect.

  5. Resa July 3, 2013 at 4:44 pm - Reply

    Instead of no meaning, a higher meaning that calls for a spiritual insight seems more fulfilling. A meaning that calls for self-awareness, honoring of feelings, and kind behavior is more likely to generate the motivation to face life’s less-than-easy events head on. Without assigning a higher meaning to life’s events, where does the motivation to do the difficult, but “right” thing come from in situations where one’s values are opposing each other?

    • Morty Lefkoe July 3, 2013 at 8:53 pm - Reply

      Hi Resa,

      We can choose to create any meaning we want. That does not negate the fact that events have no inherent meaning.

      Love, Morty

  6. preconcieved notion'er November 14, 2012 at 11:36 am - Reply

    As i was reading something came to my mind, doesn’t the way we see ourselves have a big part to play in the way we seem to perceive situations?

    for example, if i am super confident, and a girl looks at me, though she only did so because i looked familiar, and in my big headedness, i turn that to mean that she likes me. do you get what i am saying?

    where as if i was an insecure person , i would take that to mean she is looking at how ugly i am, or that there is something wrong with my face at that time.

    • Morty Lefkoe November 14, 2012 at 1:12 pm - Reply

      Hi,

      Yes, the way we perceive ourselves has a major impact on the meaning we give events. But the way we perceive ourselves is mainly the result of the beliefs we have about ourselves, such as I’m not good enough, I’m not important, etc.

      You can eliminate those two beliefs using our free belief-elimination program at http://recreateyourlife.com.

      Love, Morty

      • preconcieved notion'er November 14, 2012 at 4:01 pm - Reply

        Thanks

  7. John September 8, 2012 at 12:34 am - Reply

    Max if you are still reading this discussion, I would like to learn more about your methods. You can write to me at jkd777@abv.bg or point me to a place on internet where I can find more info about them.

    • Max September 8, 2012 at 6:34 pm - Reply

      Hi John!

      Yes, I’m still here, and I appreciate your interest.

      There is no place to read about my discoveries in the psychology field.

      It makes just little more than one year since I came up with this new paradigm that I use today… I had LOTS of emotional trouble of my own to take care, and I still have several problems to take care, so I didn’t take much time to study, create and test a great method to everybody, I just have some ideas, some guidelines and my own experience.

      I do have interest in teach and work with interested people, so we can learn together how the process works and what is the best way to guide new people on how to get rid of their egos.

      However, I don’t have any interest in spending my time with people that don’t take things seriously. It takes lots of time to formulate my answers, and there is a complicator that english isn’t my native language, so it takes even more time to me to write.

      If my proposal interests you, you could start our chat by talking about your current experience and situation. Or just answer the way you think is better.

      I’m also sending this answer to your email, so you can answer me there.

  8. Artur February 17, 2012 at 2:21 am - Reply

    Thanks for Reply about valuing something.
    Maybe it is just I but from my experience when I dissolved to many believes my values in ex: having a loving relationship or making a difference in people’s lives disappeared. I didn’t want to do it anymore but fortunately for me I new why it happened so I needed to find the deep beliefs I dissolved time ago and see them again and use my own critical thinking and now I started to see value in valuing some things in my life again and started to think for my self and started to life my life the way I want.
    That was my experience.
    Love, Artur

  9. lou January 11, 2012 at 9:28 am - Reply

    you said “I’ve learned that occurrings can come from beliefs, therefore eliminating beliefs will change future occurrings. However, occurrings also can come from moods, physical sensations, conditionings, senses, etc., therefore, merely eliminating beliefs will not stop all occurrings”

    where did you come up with that assumption that eliminating beliefs wont stopp all occurings? what makes you think physical sensations/moods etc have nothing to do with beliefs. lol in my experience when you change a belief (find the right one) those things can change.

    • Morty Lefkoe January 11, 2012 at 3:59 pm - Reply

      Hi Lou,

      I came up with my assumption from my own experience and the experience of others in my classes.

      I’ve never seen a “cold” disappear by eliminating beleifs. ANd yet having a cold can influence the meaning you give events.

      I do think that beliefs are the major source of our occurrings, but not the only source.

      Thanks for the question.

      Love, Morty

  10. m August 17, 2011 at 12:14 pm - Reply

    I was searching for ‘why people make meaning’ and came to this site.
    I am referring to the wanting of ‘a meaningful job’ or a ‘meaningful conversation’…I am beginning to question – everything. I’ve been ill in bed for one and half months and have felt the sudden surrender that happens when there is no-thing else to do, say or even become. I know I am he creator/architect of my life…I just don’t know what it is that I want any more. Is this mid-life inquiry?

    • Lauren August 17, 2011 at 12:50 pm - Reply

      m,
      Sometimes we can reach a point in our lives when we look around and wonder what’s going on and is what I did important and if it was important, is this the end of my life existentially? I don’t know what kind of job you had or your situation; IMHO, you have had time to contemplate your life and perhaps you didn’t do this before your illness. Now, I am guessing you have all kinds of questions bubbling up about yourself personally and not just what everyone else says you NEED or SHOULD to have a life that brings you fulfillment. You’ve finally given yourself permission to actually let questions arise instead of always having everything “taken care” of. Check out Morty’s other blog entries; they’ll help you sort out what you’re going through.
      Love and Light,
      Lauren

  11. Lauren July 25, 2011 at 12:39 pm - Reply

    I do understand the concept of occurring very well and I do agree our minds are full of these occurrings because we are human beings. I’ve been through the LOP course and the LBP. I have probably eliminated two or three more beliefs since I did the program. I admit I would like to get rid of more of them and haven’t done so. And no I don’t believe occurrings pop up through spontaneous creation. I know they come from an opinion I made because of a situation. I’ve tried so many different ways to free myself and this method works for me. If you have a method that works as well and quicker, I would love to find out what it is. Whether I’m wrong or right isn’t even an issue with me.
    Love and Light,
    Lauren

    • Max July 25, 2011 at 1:02 pm - Reply

      Now you said it! :)

      I would encourage you to study Morty’s book and reflect by yourself about this things, because its not up to me teaching this things here. The “trick” to upgrade LBP is that the belief and the meaning are not the same thing. Discover the meaning of your belief, conditioning or sense (asking what it mean?) and dissolve the meaning, doing that the belief dissolves without you having to know why it was created, or when or how.

      • Morty Lefkoe July 26, 2011 at 8:59 am - Reply

        Hi Max,

        I’d love a fuller explanation.

        For me, a belief is the meaning we give a series of events that have no inherent meaning. That is the principle underlying the Lefkoe Belief process.

        If you see it differently and have a way to eliminate beliefs without having to know the source, I’d love to know about it. I don’t understand how dissolving the “meaning of a belief” would eliminate the belief.

        I’ve learned that occurrings can come from beliefs, therefore eliminating beliefs will change future occurrings. However, occurrings also can come from moods, physical sensations, conditionings, senses, etc., therefore, merely eliminating beliefs will not stop all occurrings.

        Love, Morty

        • Max July 26, 2011 at 11:41 am - Reply

          Hi Morty!

          We already talked in facebook some time ago, but you discontinued the conversation when i said that i wasnt a big fan of chatting via phone. I dont know if you were too busy or what, i didnt ask.

          You are right, occurings come from various things, and all off them can be dissolved as well. I found that its possible to dissolve body sensations like sleepiness, lazyness, tiredness, headaches, sexual excitation, pleasure, etc. This is a very powerful thing for people like me who wants to follow difficult spiritual teachings like chastity. Thanks to you i’m doing progress in this field :)

          If you are willing to chat more about my thoughts i’m still available, but like i said previously, i think that text conversations are more organized to expose the ideas.

          Thanks.

  12. Lauren July 25, 2011 at 11:07 am - Reply

    Max,
    This zoo you’re speaking of is also an “occurring”:)

    • Max July 25, 2011 at 12:15 pm - Reply

      I think that you didn’t understand the concept of occurring… and from where the “occurrings” come? Spontaneous creation?

      I also think that is remarkable how stubborn people interested in self-development can be, its amazing! They say that they want to improve themselves, but at same time they want to defend that they are already right. Improve what, if we are already right? The mind paradox is something really incredible…

  13. Max July 23, 2011 at 11:06 pm - Reply

    Our mind serves to make distinctions, so if doing that was a bad thing then we also wouldn’t need to have a mind in the first place. The problem is the “unconscious” part; we can use our mind freely, but we also have to take care to not create new conditionings and prisons for our conscience. Because the way we are born and growth – like babies and children with no capacity to do this kind of work – we all became unconscious, it’s just natural to that occur. A child can’t understand very much this kind of knowledge and can’t work on herself. Then we grow up, discover that we are mess up and don’t know what to do about it, there is no Lefkoe around us. I understand in this way…

    The other point, about occurrings, all of them are created by and can be traced to our existing beliefs, conditionings, senses, expectations, etc. Training to give no meaning is just a way to suppress our mind and closing the door to cleaning ourselves in the proper way.

    • Lauren July 24, 2011 at 5:54 pm - Reply

      Max,
      I disagree with your conclusion that “training to give no meaning is just a way to suppress our mind and closing the door to cleaning ourselves in the proper way.” I went through the LOP and I feel as if my mind has opened and expanded, not closed down and suppressed. Though I haven’t practiced as long as Morty has, most of the time I am able to dissolve my occurrings without consciously using the steps of the process. I’m curious; what is this method for “cleaning ourselves in the proper way”?
      Love and Light,
      Lauren

      • Max July 24, 2011 at 6:26 pm - Reply

        Hi Lauren!

        I think that dissolving occurrings in kind like cleaning poop of an animal that lives in your mind: you will always have poop to clean. To me makes more sense just eliminating the animal.

        There are improved ways to use LBP and LSenseP that makes you able to do a good clean up on your mind. I already told Morty some of my ideas, but after that he just dropped from our conversation. Just for example, i’m currently able to identify and dissolve beliefs, conditionings, senses, expectations, imaginations, etc., in less than a minute. Imagine 4 hours of work on myself doing that…

        • Lauren July 24, 2011 at 10:50 pm - Reply

          More power to you if you’ve found a swifter way to eliminate beliefs, occurrings, etc. And thanks for clearing up your “cleaning” method. Dissolving occurrings doesn’t feel at all like “cleaning poop of an animal that lives in my mind”. Poop is waste…and it also fertilizer: being able to dissolve occurrings means seeing a situation or, in this case, a substance as it is. Still, again, I am curious about your method.
          Love and Light,
          Lauren

          • Max July 24, 2011 at 11:05 pm

            You dont feel that you are just cleaning poop because you not even noticed that there is an entire zoo screwing around in your mind… where the “occurring” comes from? :)

  14. Nicholas Godwin July 21, 2011 at 1:50 pm - Reply

    Morty, thanks for these insights… This is helping me redefine my relationship with my brother… and I think it’s worth all I can pay… right now though I haven’t got The Lefkoe Method, but I’ll do that in the shortest time possible… thanks for everything!

  15. Randy Z July 21, 2011 at 5:13 am - Reply

    I’d also like to offer that the very question “Why Do We Need To Create Meaning?” is redundant and explaining the reason(s) why also gives context to its exploration. That is, since things only have the meaning we give them (or agree to in a social scope) then they have no inherent meaning (see Sartre… being-for-itself, in-itself, etc.).

    So ‘create’ and ‘meaning’ are actually synonyms. Sure you can create different physical things, but you can’t have the thing without also the idea of a thing. In other words, all creating is already, always, creating meaning… (the ‘epistomology’ of creating is to create meaning).

    The question of “Why” is always conventional. It’s asking for a justification. It has to be conventional because there’s no such thing as an existential justification. Why, is, a rock? Well because it is….that question doesn’t mean anything… Why is “is”? .. Cause it is! .. The cause is the same as the thing itself. Non-sequitor.

    So to ask why we need to create meaning it seems to be because knowing is better than guessing… we want certainty because the very thought, literally, that is consciousness is predicated on the certainty of “I am.” and therefore we’d want to have the same kind of Ontological relationship with everything we perceive.. we’d want certainty about everything.

    If we didn’t live with other humans we would be ok with existential certainty…I am and that’s enough. But to experience others forces one to want to have certainty about their existence as well, can’t be done cause they’re not me, and as such there is a gap between ‘being ok being me’ and ‘being ok with accepting others as not-me to the same degree’ .. well that ain’t gonna happen… a circle isn’t a square.. sure I can use visual distortions, distinctions, and cognitive bias to try an approximate one as another but it’s just a model, not ‘the real thing’ and as a result there is going to be a complaint… an anxiety… between our desire to have conventional certainty and the inability of existential certainty to make it happen. So I say it’s not just wanting that gives suffering but conventional perception because to conventionally perceive is to give meaning and that meaning will demand existential validation and that’s a square/circle again.

    We need to create meaning because we’re suffering machines and we don’t want to be. I think maturity is being ok with not having to be ok. Not easy, but that’s just one being’s opinion.

  16. Randy Z July 20, 2011 at 8:11 pm - Reply

    Agree a million percent… understanding conventional vs. existential … problems are created in the conventional (the ‘shoulds’ that get unfulfilled) and solved in the existential (that we see it’s the meaning we bring, and not any inherent meaning) that informs both the solution and happiness. Conventional happiness: hard; Existential happiness: easier – just be grateful.

  17. Justin July 20, 2011 at 5:54 pm - Reply

    Hey Morty,
    I had the same question as well. Eliminating certain beliefs may cause us to become careless and reckless. But you said that our values are still held intact.

    • Morty Lefkoe July 22, 2011 at 11:05 am - Reply

      Hi Justin,

      In helping thousands of people eliminate tens of thousands of beleifs, I haven’t found a single instance when eliminate beleifs caused anyone to become careless and reckless.

      Can you give me an example of what you think might happen? I tried to explain in my post why it won’t happen.

      Thanks for your interest in our work.

      Love, Morty

      • Justin July 22, 2011 at 5:50 pm - Reply

        Hi Morty,
        Let’s say that I completely removed the belief of what others think about me. Would this free me and at the same time would it cause me to be reckless/careless when dealing with or considering others?

        I think that the reason that many of us are hesitant about removing limiting beliefs is “what if we becomes someone we don’t like.”

        I hope this answers your question. :)
        Thanks

        • Max July 23, 2011 at 10:32 pm - Reply

          Dissolving a belief isn’t the same of dissolving your good sense. It’s just the opposite: by eliminating a belief – which ultimately it’s a lie – you can deal with reality in a more intelligent way.

        • Morty Lefkoe August 9, 2011 at 3:15 pm - Reply

          Hi Justin,

          There is nothing about eliminating that belief that would make you act in any particular with others. Eliminating beliefs does not stop you from using good judgment.

          Thanks for the conversation.

          Love, Morty

        • Artur February 16, 2012 at 3:17 am - Reply

          Hi Justin,
          from my experience I agree with you.
          In my opinion, likes and dislikes, good – bad and social/religion needs come indirectly from the meaning, beliefs we give the events/things.
          If person really in 100% dissolves all the meanings what would be left from the person? What would that person feel and need?
          Would he/she feel anything more than the need for food, warm shelter, some sort of security (not necessary money), maybe sex?
          Isn’t need to make money, have houses, cars and anything that society demands comes from giving things meanings?
          And If so, then If we really, honestly dissolved all the meanings we give to the things would we still want to leave in this society with our families, children, make money, have all this material things etc.?
          Doesn’t a good judgment comes from a belief what a good judgment is and why to be good?
          I wonder if anyone can comment on this.

          And I am full fan of all these “social things” – I just think they come from meanings we give things – and If so do we really want to dissolved all the meanings or did we really dissolved all the meanings
          Thank you.

          • Morty Lefkoe February 16, 2012 at 9:27 pm

            Hi Artur,

            There is a difference between the meaning we give an event, how ti occurs to us, and valuing something. We can say we value having a loving relationship or making a difference in people’s lives. Those are not occurrings. They are values. Two totally different things. Dissolving all occurrings will not keep us from having values.

            Love,Morty

  18. Jose July 20, 2011 at 2:40 pm - Reply

    So, do you think people think about why me? why do this does not work?

    There is a saying that says that people don’t like thinking at all. What do you think about that? Maybe they just had all their questions answered when they were children.

    I met a young man the other day: He said: “when I was a child people will bother me because of my looking(I did not see what was special bad or look about his looking), so I do no have friends”.

    PS:Is it just me or somebody else agrees that the tiger is in an absurd position. It has no meaning at all. Front legs should not be stretched at all until the tiger falls from the jump, it has not dynamic sense , and if he wants to be aggressive cats use claws first, not fangs.

  19. Ian July 20, 2011 at 12:02 pm - Reply

    Hay

    This post is interesting and has clarified a few points that i have been thinking about as I am slowly learning that on a moment by moment basis meaning is all in my head. I read a great quote that clarified this for me the other day, something to the effect of “Meaning is a projection on to the world, and meaninglessness is the meaning we give to the realization that meaning is projected”. and “Meaning is not non-projected”.

    What is your experience of giving no meaning to events Morty? is it to be in a state of non thought like meditation a large amount of time? I am also curious to know that when you do have a thought/occurring arise, is there some type of constant recognition that the thought/occurring is not real as and when it comes up?

    Thanks for all you do

    Ian

    • Doug Cartwright July 20, 2011 at 4:46 pm - Reply

      Hi Ian,

      If I may hazzard a reply, the idea that events have no meaning is simply one more meaning. We cannot escape it. We cannot step outside of our own meaning making process although we can make meanings that fool ourselves into thinking we can. This is what I have found.

      Doug

      • Sean August 17, 2011 at 6:56 pm - Reply

        Doug,
        it’s not about the idea of not giving meaning, it’s about the practice of not giving meaning. When you stop giving meaning to an event, any feelings you thought were caused by the event dissolve. You then realize it is only the meaning you give an event that can cause you an emotional response. You’re left with what you can see and hear, which can’t make you feel anything.

        Sean

    • Morty Lefkoe July 22, 2011 at 11:18 am - Reply

      Hi Ian,

      After lots and lots of practice, I am able to distinguish occurrings from events in a matter of seconds almost all the time. ANd merely making a clear distinction between the two enables me to dissolve the occurring.

      Love, Morty

  20. Alex July 20, 2011 at 10:04 am - Reply

    Did I mention that I love you Morty? These posts are gold. Thanks for sharing!

    I found these 2 parts particularly insightful and useful:

    1) We create meaning as a way to survive

    2) No meaning doesn’t equal blindly putting ourselves in danger. We can make temporary assumptions that we keep checking on for accuracy.

  21. Claude William Genest July 20, 2011 at 9:33 am - Reply

    Excellent Morty.

  22. John B. July 20, 2011 at 8:29 am - Reply

    If you’re looking for peace of mind then absolutely it’s the right call Morty! I continually see others — and catch myself — attaching unnecessary meanings to events that can’t truly be judged. It’s just one of the reasons why anxiety and depression are so outrageous in number today. Your work is helping to blaze the path.

    Thanks,

    — John

  23. Doug Cartwright July 20, 2011 at 3:09 am - Reply

    Hi Morty,

    A distinction you might like (If you don’t already know) it is the General Semantics distinction of ‘tentative forever’ which reflects your idea that we cannot know for sure whether or perceptions are a completely accurate map of reality. I am reading (and reccomend) the book Driving Yourself Sane as it offers more tools to help people make the distinction between unknowable reality and the accuracy of our maps. Great post Morty, I will read it again.

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